personal space invasion

dear kind lady in the coffee shop,

we both got here pretty early. I settled in at 7, and you followed at 7:15. there were plenty of open tables out front. I chose to sit in the back room because I have to use the phone during business hours, and I prefer to avoid disturbing those who came for silence.

but you joined me in the back room. not just in the back room, but the chair closest to me. I could hear you breathing. really? you weren't comfortable anywhere else? you didn't even have a drink!

my theory is that you snuck in while the poor girl up front was washing dishes and camped out in the back corner to use the wifi. head's up...they don't care if you just use the wifi! especially when it's not busy and there are plenty of open tables. like today. when you sat right next to me.

sincerely,
the girl who answered her phone several times and kept sneezing in your direction.

my "whoops"

dear owner of the green house with 70's style windows,

I'm sorry my dog dropped a big "deuce" in your front yard. he was totally off schedule today, and I was left without a baggie. I felt terrible...but there was no way I was going to pocket the evidence and carry it all the way home.

that's just not my style.

so next time you mow the grass, feel free to curse my name. or don't. because you don't know me. and next time I promise to encourage him to wait until we are off your property.

sincerely,

the shady girl trying to hide the fact that my dog was pooping on your front lawn